Seek and Share....

In the last year I came across a few instances where all the person needed was some one just to make them think what is the direction they should take.... They wanted to share the problem they are looking at or thoughts that are not clear for them..In these situations my suggestion is to share as you dont know where you get a  solution or suggestions to solution or make you think clearly. I will just share what happened in each case...I write you decide (ABN Phrase copy here- We report you Decide)

About 6 months back.
..

There is a general fear among many students that UPSC Civil Services is very tough... What I learnt talking to working IAS, IPS and others who prepared for that is: the exams and preparation is not tough, but it is a test for your sincerity and dedication for a couple of years. Choosing right topics and finally a peaceful environment to prepare are key too. I was chatting with some one from our college about 6 months back.. I was really happy she was clear in her mind she wants to attempt UPSC Civil Services. All I told her was that is right decision. After that a couple of times a few encouraging words why she should take UPSC seriously and work for few years to clear them. Now she is in Delhi preparing for the exams. I wish her all the best and pray she clears... UPSC... However the point is I never realized till I started talking to another student in college in same lines that - what she told me made me think of this topic... the 2nd student preparing for Civil Service in Hyderabad told me that when every one in college - professors, students and others were discouraging students that they can not clear UPSC Civil Services what I told one student that with time and effort she can do it.,. made many think in that direction...I felt all I did was just a pat on her back that she is in right direction... thats all. A clarity of thinking is the direction here

About 2 months back...

A friend and student of mine who is working in SP Mahila University called me up and asked me to talk to a person who moved back from UK to council him. Yes it is a big word...counselling as I do not have necessary educational qualifications to be a shrink nor counsel  however I try to use my life lessons and teach out of them...so having faith in me this friend sent this guy from UK to me. He came to our office one day... and wanted to talk for 30 mins... So we started talking... I was surprised that he was holding a very good job in UK and his mom asked him to come back to India.. No problems there as parents wants their children to come back to be before their eyes. This person landed from UK not knowing the Indian market for what he is looking for jobs. Any ways while talking to him I learnt of certain advantages he has to attempt Civil Services. After talking to him for late into evening hours. We spoke for an hour about preparing for civil services .. while he was planning to leave.. he made a comment... "Sir you are the first person to encourage me to take up UPSC Civil services while my own family told me I can not do it...you made it sound so simple ..." Again all I did was make him realize his advantage that he can take the exam a few more times to clear it, if needed... I felt I did it again... just a tap on his shoulder. I did not hear back from him so far.. but I hope he is in right track...
Here also I did not give a solution but asked him to look for various options that will eventually lead him to a solution possibly

About a week back:

I started using Face Book actively to to network with SVUCE and APRSK alumni... I keep adding a lot of SVUCE / APRSK folks and accept a lot of requests from them too..A few days back I came back from my morning walk and was on FB as the news paper guys did not show up yet.. Some one pinged me wishing me.. I checked that he is from SVUCE... I started talking to him. He is working in core engineering in a  very reputable firm that is fast growing. All of a sudden he asked me out of blue in first conversation that he wanted to move to software job...Of late one thing I am asking all students is not to move to IT Jobs if they can avoid while they are from Core Engineering branches: Civil, Mech, EEE, ECE and Chem Engg. I keep clearly telling them, it is not that they wont be successful in IT/Software but they have to plan and grow well otherwise they might get frustrated after 5 years...

So back to our story... this guy wanted move to software jobs. After a couple of mins of chat, I asked him to give his number or call me. Later that afternoon in lunch time we connected. The first question I asked him was why is he planning to change. He was also pretty open and told me he wants to change for financial benefit. It took me just 5-10 mins to make him think why he should not leave the existing job and what are his options... Also asked him to connect with our alumni in his company. That is all I spoke to him...I was not sure at the end what and how he received the whole topic. Around night 10 pm I got a message in FB thanking me for helping him. Boooooom it hit me that there are many in this world who just needs someone they can trust and share the problem. It is not that everyone is looking for solution... but a path that they can take I felt  that might possibly lead to a solution...
Finally I spoke to a friend of mine where his brother is going to college (to support him this student felt his money is not enough) who is willing to help..
I think all I did here is to give him a process to think himself to come out of his situation and to improve his own position in his present job..

Ohhhh... I am sounding like a swamijeee... Umm not sure good or bad... but at the end I felt all people need, anyone, is a pat on the back to assure some one is always there... to show them right path ...

I remember one quote from one of very famous author from AP... the quote is in Telugu "Penchukonte perigedi sneham, panchikonte tarigedi baadha" meaning in English translates to " Friendship grows by nourishing it and pain is relieved by sharing"